IT BUGS ME WHEN ...

HOME AGAIN
HOME AGAIN
JIGGITY-JIG


 


 
 people ask me to help them do something ... and I agree to help.  Then they sit back and watch ME do it by myself!      someone stands up to make a speech and can't stop saying "I'd like to" ... nobody's stopping you! JUST DO IT! For example, instead of saying "I'd like to thank my parents..." why not just say "Thank you Mom and Dad" or "I'm grateful to my parents" or "I'm thankful to my parents".  Or, for example, "I'd like to thank you all for coming to my party ... why not just say, "Thank you, everyone, for coming to my party" or "I'm delighted to see you here celebrating with me."    people cram "as it were" and "if you will" into every sentence    friends confirm arrangements to meet at a specific time and then show up late!    toilet paper in public washrooms is so flimsy, it tears off in half-inch scraps    they pile up the snow at intersections, making it impossible to see oncoming cars when merging into traffic    others tell me to button up or wear a scarf ... because they are c-c-cold    people say, "C'mon over at 6:00," and when I show up on time they go into shock because they haven't even showered yet    some jerks consider themselves wine connoisseurs - those who've likely convinced themselves that Birkenstock is a European dry white!    people (one in particular) keep on flipping channels before allowing enough time to see what's on!    pet-owners walk their dogs off-the-leash, and then pretend to scoop the poop    people sing horrific off-key soul versions of the national anthem at sporting events    the doors in tiny public washroom cubicles open inward ... so in order to close the door you end up practically straddling the toilet    people affirm that they're either cat-lovers or dog-lovers ... as if there's some law stating that you can't love both    people turn off the roadway into a shopping mall and stop dead right there ... leaving me half-turned, with my car's rear a target for oncoming traffic!    people insist on bringing gifts every time they come to visit, especially when told not to!
    people say "I could care less" instead of "I couldn't care less"    movies are classified as "romantic comedies" - and they're all about adultery - which is not really funny ... and not even so romantic!    people pull their cars all the way to the right in preparation to turn left!    people cheat and lie!    somebody asks how to get from here to there, and then start walking away while you're in the middle of giving directions. at a party, the person seated on my right is having an animated conversation with person on my left ... and I catch sight of their spit particles hovering over my plate!   you telephone some big prestigious company and they put you on hold with "your call is important to us ... all our agents are busy, etc" and then they stick you with the most nerve-jangling music (accompanied by periods of static) while you wait forever for a real person to answer. Why don't they have a feature like "for classical music press one ... for rock and roll press two ... for country press three ... know what I mean?  people who treat you and your family like garbage, blindly assuming that despite their despicable behaviour,  you owe them love and respect   

My mother was right when she said ...

   THE BEST WAY OUT OF DIFFICULTY  
   IS RIGHT THROUGH IT!